


Numb to the cold

by All_the_fandoms_and_fans



Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: Anxiety, Christmas, Fluff and Angst, Ghosts, M/M, willex being adorable
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-06
Updated: 2021-01-06
Packaged: 2021-03-17 11:42:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28599402
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/All_the_fandoms_and_fans/pseuds/All_the_fandoms_and_fans
Summary: So this is my wintery Willex fic. Sorry It's a little late but I never got the chance to finish it before this week so I hope you're all still interested in Winter Willex.Basically Alex is still adjusting to becoming a ghost and Willie helps him.
Relationships: Alex Mercer/Willie (Julie and The Phantoms)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 68





	Numb to the cold

**Author's Note:**

> I read this thing that people who have anxiety often have poor circulation in their hands and feet and often get cold easily and this just sorta happened.

Alex has always gotten cold hands easily. For that reason, he’s never liked cold weather that much. 

It just takes too long to get warm again. It’s like the warmth gets sucked out of your body and unless you go for a hot shower you spend the next few hours shivering and cold. 

Granted its often worth it, especially on the rare occasion when it snows. Snowball fights and snowmen that always end up a little wonky and amazing times out with his friends’ ice skating. Those golden memories make him forget how much he hated being so cold his fingers went numb…

Numb…

That’s how it feels now, he guesses. He can see the people walking past him, sat on the beach. And it must be cold, because they’re all wearing big jacket’s, and a few have hats and gloves. And the wind whipping in off the ocean is blowing everyone’s hair about. There’s a couple on the sand near him who have cups of coffee and the steam is mixing with their breath as they sit close together, surrounding them in white vapour. 

But Alex can’t feel any of it. The wind just blows straight through him. There’s no heat left in him for it to whisk away. And the thought of how separate that makes him, is suffocating. He digs his hands into the sand beside him.

He shouldn’t stay here, he thinks. The reminder of his death is clearly not doing him any good, but he doesn’t think he can go back to the loft either. 

Christmas didn’t do the band much good, Julie, despite her amazing family, was still facing a Christmas without her mom, Luke kept disappearing to see his parents and coming back with red eyes, and Reggie found it hard to see Julies supportive family at the best of times.

Alex felt like none of them were in the right headspace to help him sort out his feelings about his family, which was why he was out here in the first place. 

He noticed it had started snowing when snowflakes started to land on him. They didn’t melt on his arms like they used to though, they just stayed on him in little fluffy clumps. He wiped them off and pushed the heels of his palms into his eyes. 

God. Sometimes everything gets so overwhelming. He hates feeling alone. He could lay down here and scream and not one passer-by would stop to help him. They wouldn’t see him at all.

Tears started to slip through his scrunched eyes. 

He heard Willie before he saw them. Heard footsteps on the sand that stopped right behind him.

“Alex,” Willies voice was soft, but it still felt too loud in Alex’s ears. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.” He says, quickly scrubbing the tears off his face as 

“It’s not nothing,” Their voice is even softer this time, “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to but it’s not nothing,”

“It’s stupid,” Alex says looking at the ground.

“I doubt that,”

Alex scoffs a little at them, “It’s not cold,” Willie falteres for a moment. “See, stupid I told you,” 

“No, no wait,” Willie moves to sit next to him, “What do you mean?” They reach out to brush some of the snow off Alex’s shoulders and arms. 

“Look,” Alex gestures at the people around them. “It’s the middle of winter and they’re all freezing. And I can’t feel it,” His voice gets small and he can feel the tears fall again “There’s not enough left of me to feel it,”

“Alex,” Willie brushes Alex’s hair back, “You know that’s not true, right?” Alex shrugges.

“I’m sorry,” Alex says, wiping away the tears, feeling ridiculous. “I told you, its…”

“It’s not stupid. Believe me, I know how much adjusting to being a ghost can hurt,” Willie smiles a weak smile. “hey, let me show you something,” They reach their hand out. “Give me your hands,”

Alex does and quickly finds his hands wrapped in both of Willies. “Oh” he says quietly. He can immediately feel the warmth from Willies fingers around his own. Willie moves to hold Alex’s face in their palm. 

“You’re freezing, Alex,” Willie says, frowning and pulling him in to press their foreheads together. “I can feel it,” 

“You feel warm,” Alex leaves one of his hands in Willies’ and wraps the other round their waist.

“Probably cos I’ve not been sat out in the cold for who knows how long,” Willie jokes. Alex smiles and then frowns.

“I had to get out of the studio,” He pulls his arm back and pulls his face out of Willies hand. Willie keeps their joined hands joined though. 

“Why?” 

“Christmas has been hard, I guess.” Willie hummed for him to continue, “I miss my family, at least I think I do, you know. Christmas always ended in a fight. Towards the end most days did. I’m not sure that I’m even supposed to miss them. sometimes I feel like I don’t care at all and other times its like I can’t even move. And I can see how much the band is hurting this year and I don’t know how to help and I’m not sure who to talk to.” 

“Talk to me,” Willie says, brushing the snowflakes off Alex’s hair.

“I’m sorry,” Alex whispers.

“You don’t have to be sorry, Alex,” 

“I feel like every time I see you, I have a breakdown and you end up picking up the pieces,” 

“Alex,” Willie presses their forehead against Alex’s temple, “I’d rather be here than have you be alone, picking up the pieces yourself,” Alex sniffs and Willie suddenly jumps up to their feet. “come here I want to show you something else,” They hold out their hand. Alex takes it and follows Willie down to the water. 

Willie bends down and puts their hand not in Alex’s, in the water. Alex laughs.

“what are you doing?” he asks,

“You’ll see,” Willie straightens back up and pulls Alex in. They bring their hand up. “Do you trust me?” Alex nods. Willie puts their hand against Alex’s cheek and Alex immediately jumps back in surprise at the feeling. It’s like ice was being pressed to his face.

“Hey!” He yelps out, but Willie is already giggling at him.

“Sorry. I thought you said you missed the cold,” 

“Yeah, Ok, I did say that,” Alex concedes, laughing too, he pulls Willie in for a kiss, their lips are still warm despite being out in the cold.

Maybe he doesn’t miss being cold at all.


End file.
